Today I need music!

Today the tears keep secretly falling, it’s a bad day I guess! Thankfully these days are few and far between, since my daughter was born a hole was filled and both her and my son make me smile both inside and out every day.

But today we found out my son didn’t get in at our preferred schools, adding to that my daughter being poorly, my husband going away for a week and  being up since 4.45 things could be better.

I feel weepy, in fact I just want to stand up shout f’ it, walk out of the office and listen to obscenely loud music in the car. But I won’t as that isn’t going to solve anything.

When I suffered with PND after my son these days became weeks, it was hideous and I know for my children’s sake I have to get up, shake myself off and deal with this stuff. After all I am the only parent for a week, I have wine and chocolate and crap on the telly, I can get through this. I have my beautiful babies to take out and spend time with I can be strong.

I also have music, my one thing for the bad days is music and I have said this so many times before. If I need empowering, cheering up, anger releasing there is always a song I can find to do it too.

For example I love ‘Run the World (Girls)’ by Beyonce it’s a great song if you need to feel empowered, Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit is my go to angry song and any Trance music is my, make me happy and dance like no one is watching music.

I love music, if I could have it playing in my head all day I would! One day eh ;)

PS. There will be no Favourite Recipe this Friday just me babbling on, however there is still an opportunity to win a recipe books on last weeks if you’d like to enter….. http://www.themummydiary.co.uk/2012/04/favourite-recipe-friday-and-recipe-book.html

Today is a 'bad' day!

Although I don't officially suffer from PND this time round I still have bad days.

Dark days where I could just run away, or worse, drive the car into wall!

I try to stay positive but after weeks of sleep deprivation I am at the end of my tether today.

Everything winds me up, I can lose it over nothing. I tend to turn into a snarling grot bag muttering profanities to myself!

I think I need a good cry and scream but where am I supposed to do this? I think I've said this before I need a special place I do do this!

Would anyone else pay for a place like this? You know a place you can listen to a song 'loud', dance, scream do whatever you need just to release tension!

As long as this bad day doesn't turn into a bad week I'll be OK, but today it feels like the light isn't on at the end of the tunnel.

My room is full and no matter how loud I scream no one can hear me :(